Wednesday, April 22, 2009

What Scares Men?

on Wednesday mornings at 6:00 AM my Husband meets the boys at a near by Starbucks for a small gathering, where they have men talk and a little bible study. These mean belong to the small group we host Wednesday nights. its funny because when we all get together for small group us women are always informed a bit on what the topic was that morning of the men meeting. and of course most of us wifes have already been filled in earlier that morning when the men have returned before they head out the door to work.

When mr Mr. got home today I asked how it went and he said great, we talked about babies... I thougth in my head how cute, the men talking about having a family without any women around, and then he says, yeah I mean we just talked about our fears with it.

so I then asked what do you mean? and I found it very interesting and LOVEd the fact that these men love their wives so much .. you will know what i mean by that in a minute.

They talked about how one of their fears is that by having a big family, it becomes easier for your marriage suffer with out noticing. i asked him to go further and he said well you know like right now your just a wife and i am your husband, when we have a baby you and i become mother and fathers and our conversation 90% of the time will be about baby baby baby ( i tried to inform him no there are so many things out there like and i have girl friends and moms and all that stuff to talk about baby baby baby

i will still be your wife and I promise to be a fantastic mommy and wife, you will still be above children ( this is something i strongly believe in GOD-husband-children-family-and so on) I think that is was a strong family is with god leading your marriage you and your husband are a strong team which makes a strong family and so on.

but I get the fear, I mean kids are a big deal, and take a lot of time. and all that stuff and you love them so much and they are time consuming and you will be super involved with them and its a another schedule to fit into a routine but im super excited :)

I want to have a big family and the Mr. has always smiled about that he loves children and will be an excellent father, I truly look forward to the day he becomes one.

with all of that said, Ithink that because we are talking about this now before there are children in the picture it is only going to make our marriage/family stronger. keeping open lines of communication in a marriage is KEY...

so for those of you followers that have babbies or are married and thinking of children, did your husband have this fear?


Mo said...

YUP! But just the financial responsibilty of raising a family well...esp since I no longer work. It's all on him.

It has been easy breezy. And it's love each other more.

I would highly suggest having children :)

Emily said...

you are totally right -god, husband, kids... my husband and i (although we are new parents) still believe this way after the baby. in fact, when our little baby was 6 weeks old we left him with my sister for one night and we took an overnight trip together to get back to just us. i think it's great that you acknoweldge this now and talk about it - it shows that you already have a great marriage to support your great family!

Q. and La. said...

Handsome did not have this fear BUT our marriage has changed radically...and it is amazing. I'm 36 weeks and wow, we can't believe that she will be here soon. With God as our rock, and putting each other first, we've grown so much closer.